Thursday, April 9, 2009

One On One













My Impromptu Interview With God’s Assistant During My Dream Last Night

Elizabeth—Where is God right now at this very minute?

G’s A—Come on, is that the best you’ve got?

Elizabeth—It’s a legitimate question for a Thursday.

G’s A—Fine. I’ll answer. Everywhere. As expected.

Elizabeth—Is that right?

G’s A—Yes.

Elizabeth—Is God male or female?

G’s A—Technically female, but also male.

Elizabeth—I don’t get it, what exactly does that mean?

G's A—It means that God is both masculine and feminine. But more mother than father.

Elizabeth—Why do human beings tend to attribute more masculine traits to God then?

G’s A—I don’t know. It wasn’t always that way.

Elizabeth—What does God intend to do about the mess the world’s in?

G’s A—It’s safe to say that God is taking a wait and see approach.

Elizabeth—Is that prudent?

G’s A—I’m not in the habit of judging my boss. But I will say this; I did ask God to do away with time. (At this point God’s Assistant’s right wing began to shake uncontrollably and his left hand reached around to steady it.) I hope I’m not overstepping my boundaries by confessing that calendars and timepieces make absolutely no sense to me. All those dates, digital read-outs, the stressful restrictions and limitations seemed so unnecessary to me. I can see how harried all that lost time could make a person feel. What a rat race it creates. 

Elizabeth—And…how did God respond to your request?

G’s A—He explained that you human’s need a linear timeline, how it’s tied in to your DNA.

Elizabeth—(I was about to ask about world hunger but decided to find out more about DNA) What is DNA?

G’s A—I like to call DNA, DON’T KNOW ANYTHING. Not to be patronizing, but you human beings kill me.

Elizabeth—How’s that?

G’s A—With your kvetching, your nervous breakdowns, your infighting, your inhumanity towards your own kind. It’s appalling. Where God finds the strength to even stay in touch with Earth is beyond me. See, it’s a good thing that I’m not in charge.

Elizabeth—Some would claim that God has forsaken the Earth.

G’s A—(G’s A’s dark eyes grew darker. G’s A’s wings spread out, leaving me in shadow) Be careful what you wish for. Things would get very ugly if God deserted you people. Very ugly.

Elizabeth—Don’t get bent out of shape. I’m just asking…

G’s A—I can’t help it. I'm very passionate. Look, God’s busy. Not all creation is bent on self-destructing you know. There are beings in this universe of pure light that actually give back to God. Human’s, they just ask and ask and ask.

Elizabeth—There are good humans. Aren’t there?

G’s A—Of course. But sometimes it’s nearly impossible to hear the good humans prayers over the din of the whiners and evildoers. Try to see it from our perspective. Heaven’s a long way a way.

Elizabeth—Is that our fault?

G’s A—What is, simply is.

Elizabeth—I want to take back a message to the people. Something positive.

G’s A—(Arms crossed, wings now tucked in) Let me think. I’ll leave you with this, try to dredge up a little excitement when you greet the new day. Savor that cup of morning coffee. Coffee beans are at the top of God’s proud creative moments—right up there with butterflies. Have a little gratitude, is that too much to ask?

Elizabeth—I don’t think so. I think I understand what your saying.

G’s A—Do you? It’s not that hard.

Elizabeth—We all can't be angels, you know.

G’s A—Word.

God's assistant disappeared, so the interview ended there. If I ever get back in touch I promise to be more prepared. I’ll ask better questions, I’ll probe deeper.



Artwork courtesy of Michelangelo--b. 1475 d. 1564 Roma. Last Judgement All Rights Reserved, Heaven.
All Rights Reserved. © 2009 by Elizabeth Bradley.

13 comments:

Sarah Rahman said...

The best part of the entire interview was the message given by the God's Assistant to the people.

I wish I could have a similar dream as I have a lot of questions that I would love to inquire.

It was a meaningful post, indeed!

Happy Blogging!

Elizabeth Bradley said...

Sarah, you make a good point. I wish you and everyone else that reads the interview will post your questions for God's Assistant right here. He's listening...

lakeviewer said...

You did well for a human, wise and astute, I think.

writermomof5 said...

Loved it! Those are nice kind of dreams to have. Thank you for sharing.

Linda Pendleton said...

I like that....

Cloudia said...

"Have a little gratitude, is that too much to ask?"

All spirituality in one sentence!!

Aloha, Eliz! & BRAVA!

Lover of Life said...

Very nice. Especially the gratitude part. I'm going to ask the assistant if we are starting to go in the right direction?

Thanks for visiting my blog -

Woman in a Window said...

yes, marvel in the magic of the moment, right now. Like this very much, god or none.

C. Michael Cox said...

Found you over at lakeviewer's place. I enjoyed this post - especially the G's A bit (instead of the Saint Peter cliche.) You've gone to heaven and I think I'll follow you.

Congratulations on your upcoming book.

GutsyWriter said...

Savor that cup of morning coffee. Coffee beans are at the top of God’s proud creative moments—right up there with butterflies. Have a little gratitude, is that too much to ask? Well I love my morning and afternoon cups and love butterflies, so I hope to say I'm grateful, although gratitude is so much easier in life when you have time. That was one TRUE POSITIVE about living on an island in the Caribbean. We had TIME, and with that cam gratitude. Great post.

Count Sneaky said...

Thank you, my dear Elizabeth' for visiting and becoming a follower. The Count draws his inspirations from daily life also, and has had a most happy, long life married to the same lovely woman for 53 years. He has one son and two grandsons, one is a sophomore in college and the other finishes high school this year. Your husband, indeed does nice graphic design work. A lovely blog that I look forward to visiting often. My best Count Sneake

cw2smom said...

Excellent entry Elizabeth! So happy for your son, by the way! Blessings! Lisa

Jennifer Hudson Taylor said...

That's cute. I do wonder how He tolerates us whiners everyday.