Monday, September 14, 2009

Ew!




I've said that I thought we moved to a nice place. But...and isn't there always a but? There's so many flies out here! I hate flies! We used to live in a rural area but we weren't around livestock, so we didn't have a fly problem. There are cows around here, down the road, and believe me, they don't call them s%#t factories for nothing. We had to go to Home Depot and buy these bags that you hang out in the yard to attract the flies or they would surely end up in the house. The bags smell like poop, probably cow poop, which seems to be really attractive to flies. I pick up the dog poop out in the yard, (a crappy theme runs through this post, sorry guys), on a regular basis, but the damn things end up inside anyway. My new hobby is running around the house, fly swatter in hand, speaking in tongues. These are the craftiest, speediest flies I've ever come across, it's nearly impossible to kill them because when they land they only sit a short spell. They see me coming with the swatter. They are noisy, and they like to dive bomb your head.

Now, for the super gross part of the story. The other day I spotted something crawling across the floor. Wait, you have to be kidding me, I thought. More than one? Are those maggots! I had maggots crawling across the kitchen? No bloody way. Yikes.

The Husband came running when he heard me screaming like a mad woman. I scared him half to death. He took the trash can outside and hosed it down and I got down to the business of ridding my floor of such disgusting vermin. Maggots are fast, really fast, I did not know this. They were crawling, (or whatever they do), for cover! I was so grossed out I had to lie down with a cold cloth over my head once I'd bleached and wiped and bleached and wiped. I totally freaked out.

Needless to say, we've always been super careful about what we throw away inside, nothing perishable. We have a garbage disposal in the sink and everything. Our trash-can has one of those lids that automatically slams shut when you take your foot off the pedal, and we use trash bags, I couldn't figure out how it happened. How I came to have a maggot farm in my house. Shudder, shudder.

I've been yelling at the dogs, they like to amble in and out, meanwhile the flies get in. So I've been teaching them to move faster, don't dawdle I tell them.

So, this afternoon, I'm in the kitchen, pouring a nice glass of my favorite fizzy water, and what do I see? You guessed. THEY'RE BACK! I took the trash can outside. I had changed the bag twice yesterday! And all that was in there was recyclable stuff, so where did they come from? I looked over the trash can, no maggots, no smell. I examined the bottom, every surface, no sign of the creepy buggers. So I went back inside. I investigated. They were under the dog food dish and little plastic stand that I keep the dishes on! Oh no! But, they weren't IN THE DOG FOOD, so what's going on? I don't know. I cleaned them up. I bleached. I tried to calm down, then I went on the Internet, (what did we do before the Internet?), so I might read up on the life cycle of a maggot. And the fly.

I'm afraid for my dogs. I'm not going to leave food out any longer. I will only feed them at designated times from here on in. Did you know that maggots can get under the skin of a dog? I had no idea! I am so disgusted. I am severely traumatized. I'm sure some of you will think I'm a big baby. And maybe I am, but I'm grossed out beyond words. Ew, and double, Ew!

That last shot is what maggots look like up close. Tell me that's not scary!

All Rights Reserved. © 2009 by Elizabeth Bradley.

22 comments:

ellen abbott said...

I hate maggots. they are so gross. And this from a girl who generally accepts all things. But maggots in the house. Gah! And it;s amazing how fast they hatch and grow. No central air in this house and we're open door people so trash can management is a must.

When it gets dark, turn off all the lights in the house except for in one room. Wait however long til all the flies migrate to the light, then shut them up in that room. Then wait for them to die. How long do you suppose that takes? I always find dead flies in the country house when we get back.

Kim said...

I am so with you on the fly/maggot topic. ARound here we have tons of flies and I'm the same as you - crazy. They make me nutty. I am getting the creeps just thinking about the maggots. We started freezing any meat waste and then throwing it out the day of garbage pick-up. I did have to laugh out loud at the vision of you needing to lie down with a cold cloth on your forehead. But not at you - because when it comes to creepy things I get into a panic.

Elspeth Antonelli said...

If you listen closely you will hear my "EWWWW" echoing down the west coast towards you. Nasty, nasty business.

I've had to deal with flies (where do they learn to dive bomb like that?) but never maggots. Maggots would make me think seriously of moving.

Keep remembering the reasons why you decided to move there...and a few glasses of wine won't hurt either.

Elspeth

Sniffles and Smiles said...

Absolutely horrible!!!! I'm so sorry you have to deal with this!!! Hope you find a foolproof solution soon!!! ~Janine XO

Brian Miller said...

maggots creepy me out too...was caving once and stuck my hand through the side of a cow that had fallen in...sorry youprobably just lost your breakfast...i did too.

Cloudia said...

Courage, Eliz;
First Frost is coming, Dear.

Aloha

Comfort Spiral

Melissa Barrett-Traister said...

Yes,this does sound like a shitty situation.I'm not a fan of insects either,not to mention snakes.Yuck.

On the plus side,this blog entry could easily be a work of creative non-fiction.Funny,and very relatable.

I look forward to reading more from you soon.
Melissa

gaelikaa said...

Oh dear! What a traumatic time for you! I don't blame you for having to offload that!

Marguerite said...

Jeepers,creepers, Elizabeth! If bleach won't kill em', what will? I sympathize and wish you all the luck in getting rid of the nasty things!

Jody Hedlund said...

Sound completely gross! I know I would be bleaching and freaking out too! We had ants in the house last year and I didn't rest until we solved the problem! But maggots? Just the word itself gives me shivers!

Galen Kindley--Author said...

I’m in sympathy with you. Fortunately, nothing like this has yet happened to us. BUT, I see two great outcomes of this…(We always try to find the positive, right?) One…this was great venting therapy (not to mention a pretty entertaining…if somewhat disturbing blog.) Two…There a great title for a book here. You wrote… The life cycle of a maggot and the fly…what a great title for like a spy thriller. No. Well, it is a bit of a reach, I guess.

Best Regards, Galen
Imagineering Fiction Blog

The Victorian Parlor said...

Ewwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!! That is so creepy and gross!!! I hope you are able to get rid of those nasty little creatures!

Blessings,

Kim

Mr. Shife said...

That is scary. Hopefully you can get rid of those little buggers for good. I wish I knew of some good techniques to get rid of flies but I don't. Maybe one of those bug zappers or you can run around with chop sticks like "The Karate Kid" and try to catch them that way. Anyway good luck in your battle and I hope you are victorious.

Nancy said...

This would send me over the edge! Seriously, it would! I think I would start with the doggy door. After moving back to the mountains from Minnesota (I would find ticks on my bed), I feel so relieved. No fleas, lice, etc. Too high. And I don't miss them a bit. I'm sure there are flys - but I can honestly say, I haven't seen any this year. Occasional yellow yackets, but not many of those either.

Ghaaa I hope you find a solution soon!

Donna M. Kohlstrom said...

I am so grossed out! Yuk! Pooey! Gag me with a pole! But your post was funny! (I'm sure you're not laughing!) Hope you win the battle of the flies and maggots! Think I'm going to have nightmares after seeing the pictures and reading your post!

The Things We Carried said...

Noooo! You poor woman. It reminds me of life in Florida and the horrid cockroaches.

Shirley Wells said...

Yikes! That is so gross. I would be totally freaked out too. Good luck and I hope you're soon free of the little buggers.

Maggie May said...

Not a bit scary, Elizabeth! Of course I'm lying!
Horrible things.
I suppose cow poop is not as nasty as dog poop as they are vegetarian. However the flies seem to love both as much.
Yes, I know about maggots getting into skin & rabbits seem to be affected if allowed to get dirty bottoms.

lakeviewer said...

I bet you miss the Pacific Northwest, its cool summer days, and no flies to speak of. There is a price to pay for living out in the country.

Alix said...

Are you absolutely positive they are maggots? I'm thinking maybe some variety of doggy worm? Like from fleas? Cats germinate these lovelies all the time, maybe dogs do too? Just wondering...

I guess this means the five-second rule is no longer employed at Casa Bradley?

colbymarshall said...

I think maggots disgust me more than anything on earth. Period.

sarah said...

ok serious stuff to you living it -but me sitting here in the maggot safety of my home, I howled at your description. You're too funny. Hope you finally got rid of them.